The Gender Whisperer

i hide

i move

i blend

all in plain sight

not quite of those i move among

i wish i was

i want to be

and everything i’m told says

i should be

i learn

i play

and the friends i have

all seem so different to who i feel i am

i hide

i blend

but sometimes

i get seen

and then i shrink away

i did something

i said something

that doesn’t seem to fit

fit the pattern of who i should be

it’s my skin

it’s my face

it’s my body

they just don’t seem to quite be who i should be

so i hide

i blend

and sometimes i shrink

and shrink some more

until that day

that splendid day

that horrific day

that day i will never forget

when someone

a quiet someone

a stranger someone

looked at me and saw me for who i am

only looked at me for moment

with eyes full of tenderness

eyes full of warmth

but in that moment

i knew

i had been seen

i ran

i froze

i ran some more

my feet feel frozen to the ground

i ran

i shrunk

i barely moved and yet

all of me ran as far away as i could

i watch

wary

but the eyes

the smile

said warmth

said tenderness

and something even more

i couldn’t look

i shouldn’t run

but when all was done

i dared something i’d never done before

as all walked away

i stayed and drew near

and quietly sat nearby

thank you

was all i could say

was all i could do

as i sat so quietly nearby

the eyes were bright

a smile so full of warmth

these words came back

a whisper

a breeze of sound

i thought i heard

but had never heard

i thought i heard the words

“you are beautiful”

but that could never be

i looked

i dared to look

“you are”

at that moment

i had to choose

to run

or

melt

Australia's new PM coined the term "Gender Whisperer" for people who help kids understand
who they are. Scott Morrison, that prime minister, did not use it in a complementary manner but still
it has been adopted by some wonderful friends of mine. This is for them and what they do.
Particularly for how they help the trans community.
(C) Copyright Luke Visser 2018 (written Sept 2018)